Chapter 1

2020 07 30

I woke up in pain and dry mouth two nights in a row. Yesterday and today. Today was much worse. The following is exactly in detail how my dreams transpired.

My dream started with a friend and I just leaving an event and were walking back to his vehicle at night. The streets were wet from a recent rain and glimmered from the street lights above. The damp and warm night felt comfortable to me. The low energy and quiet surroundings was healing me in a calming way. We arrived at his truck parked on one side of the street and I opened the passenger door while he opened his door on the driver’s side. We dug through some bags and I found a pouch with something of mine that I recognized and hadn’t seen in a long time. It looked like a piece of paper and the significance wasn’t ever revealed to me, but I cherished it as if it meant a lot to me. In the distance a half block away is a truck headed our way. My friend and I were joking around and talking. Suddenly the big truck with big tires drove up and parked just beside us on the street with three people in it. One tall skinny guy who was the driver and two regular sized guys, all muscular build and dark hair. I saw the faces of all three very well now and throughout the dream and the leader who was the driver seemed to have recognized me too but never told me. I quickly deduced this by the look he gave me as I hoped to not misjudge his attitude. They all got out of the truck and acted as if they knew my friend. By the way they were acting I realized they were there to cause harm to my friend. They shot my friend with a shotgun in the chest without a flinch as if he owed them something or did them wrong. I never witnessed anything like this before. Terrified by what just occurred my heart sunk and my face muscles clenched as my heart pounded like the drumming of a death march as I felt my life no longer had significance. I quickly pulled myself together and started running in a random direction anywhere away from there through yards and over fences changing directions as I went to become less predictable. They initially watched as I ran and didn’t pursue me or threaten me but I ran hard and fast until I found an empty house I thought would keep me safe. I heard the truck pull up moments later besides the house and I quickly hid out of view. I was so scared I didn’t dare breathe. My intuition told me they already knew I was there and after a short time they found me hiding in a closet. They figured out how to turn the lights on and we all gathered into the same living room and they began conversing amongst themselves. Not once did they harm or threaten me. They acted friendly towards me like seeing an old friend which gave me some relief. My intuition told me they were playing a psychological game with my soul. I probably could run away I thought but with a deadly threat not directed towards me its likely I could be in a safer position than most people in the world right now. After a while they got me to smile and laugh at one of their stupid jokes to calm me down. I acted as if I was okay as I was confused but too scared to tell them that. I was able to walk away into another room alone. My eyes carefully scanned the room for a telephone. I found one and called 911 but was almost caught doing so. They found out what I was up to or figured it was a high probability of me calling for help but it didn’t concern them. When the police arrived there was a thorough search of every room to figure out what was going on. The bad guys waited before attacking and within a few moments shots were exchanged and all the police died. They had no idea what they were up against. I could only assume the bag guys were highly trained and this obviously wasn’t their first time because one by one each police officer died with the least amount of shots fired as if this had been practiced many times. While this was going on I made a daring escape from the building and ran down the street to find another building to hide in. They found me again as if I had some kind of honing beacon on me. My intuition told me this wasn’t normal circumstances and I needed a new level of knowledge to avoid these bad guys.

Just then I woke up from this dream and realized the leader of these bad guys was the same person from a dream I had years ago which began as a successful solo terrorist plot to blow up a busy train station. After the explosion had occurred and many innocent lives lost, I witnessed the perpetrator casually and quietly fleeing and so I cautiously pursued him. We ended up at a different train yard some distance away and somehow he knew I was pursuing him. He walked up to me and began calmly talking to me as an old friend would and not once did I feel afraid. I was too busy taking in everything that was transpiring. As we kept walking towards some destination I observed him communicating to random people as if nothing happened earlier that day. He told me its time for him to leave as he walked in between train tracks and off into the distance headed somewhere else never to be seen again until now.


I digress.


The following night my dream continued once more as if I have some unresolved issue that is pressing me to figure out the meaning and find correlation from real life. I woke up distressed with anxiety because I don’t know how many more nights I can withstand these vivid dreams that wake me in panic. What crisis in my life is occurring to manifest such uncontrollable evil thoughts? I then remembered to regain focus by doing some mental grounding techniques. As I remained calm I began writing my dream once more.